Let's Play!

Cael didn't sleep very soundly, but he was out cold all the same. He needed to catch up on some rest. It was his turn. For example, he'd sleep a solid eleven hours before waking up for the sole purpose of finding a bathroom in a dazed stupor.

Alyson cheated and ordered ihop, delivery style thanks to mason, and remained in bed for the next two days, with the sole intent to eat her way in take out.

Mason camped out mostly at the hospital, interested in his newbie and wanting to figure her out.



Finally, on his second pot of coffee of the morning, Cael was somewhat functional.



"do you want to go see them?"

Alyson shrugged.



" i am fine with pancakes, coffee, and my pump."



she replied, seeming to have turned into the stereo typical ppd type case.



(postpartum depression)

Cael sighed.



"Then we'll take all of that with us when we go. Come on. Get ready."

Alyson shook her head.



" nope, staying here, pjs are much more comfortable anyway."

Cael looked over at her.



"Then wear the pjs. Come on."



He grabbed his keys.

" i'm fine here, cael. you can go."

"Not without you."

Alyson sighed.



" well, mason is pretty muych living there, so no worries."



and to her room to bed she went.

"You're a jerk. I wanted to see my own kid, and I can't do that because you can't be bothered."

alyson stopped, looking back at him.



" i am not stopping you form seeing him."

"Yes, you are. I'm not going without you."

Alyson motioned.



" why? so he can fall into nothing again? so i can look at one ill child, and one child i have no idea what i'm going to do to be able to care for it?"

Cael pressed his lips together for a long moment, counting backwards from five to try and attempt to keep himself from saying something stupid on this front.



"You would rather give up now and leave them all alone?"

" they aren't alone! they are surrounded by doctors, nurses, and pretty much anyone else who sticks their heads in there. Mason only leaves to deliver food for me, that's it. there is always someone there, for both of them."

Cael just watched her.



"You don't want them."

Alyson shook her head slowly.



" i never said that."



she stated in a soft voice now, seeming to have completely flipped from defensive to sad. she honestly thought they weren't going to be ok. she didn't know how to handle that.

Cael gestured.



"You're their mother, Alyson. You need to be there for them."

" just because i am not sitting in a little cubical in the hospital, poking at them does not mean i am not there for them."



defensive, and hurt.

Cael just shook his head.



"You're just avoiding them because it hurts. This isn't easy for any of us."

" Am i not allowed to hurt, seeing them as they are?"

"Yes."



Cael sighed softly now, running his hands through his hair.



"But they still need you."

" i will be right here when i am needed, right now, all they need is milk."



everything else was being given by doctors and other medical staff.

"Wrong."



Cael just stared at her.

Alyson shook her head. she had seen how the nurses had fawned ove rher kids. she wasn't needed for that, she had seen the doctors keeping them alive, she wasn't needed for that. all she was, was a milk factory at best.

"Alyson... just try?"

Alyson sighed.



" Fine. We will go."



She had absolutely no intentions to interact with the children in any way. She was in a very bad way dealing with postpartum depression on top of her normal issues.

Cael would be the one to take her.

Alyson watched as Cael wondered into the little private room, noting Mason passed out beside his little girl. Such a strong, good dad. It surprised her in a good way as she looked over the other... Her son, completely shadowed now that mom was close by. Alyson just hung her head and took a few more steps back. He'd return solid at this point. Alyson knew she needed to stay away.



she would flinch and try not to crumble though as she heard Cael being told about a surgery Benjamin was looking like he might need.

Cael nodded slightly.



"I understand. We'll see, then."



The man reached out, taking Alyson's hand and guiding it in towards the baby.

Alyson looked over her son, then to Cael.



" he's going to die, isn't he?"



She asked him, defeat clear in even her posture as she ran her hands over the isolette glass.

"No, not necessarily. He could be just fine."

Alyson shook her head slowly.



" I do not know..."



she didn't believe it and looked completely crushed.

Cael touched her fingers.



"It's possible for him to be completely okay."

Alyson shook her head.



" I..."



she shook her head and looked over him. She looked at him and kissed him and left to sit outside the room.

Cael went with her, sitting down beside the woman.



"You can do this."

Alyson shook her head.



" No.. My son is dying."



She swallowed hard, looking to Cael.



" the only piece of you i was going to have left, is going to die before you do."



She was silently crying as she looked from his face.



" I came so you could see him, go be with him."

Cael slowly slid an arm around her waist.



"I'll stay with you."



That was his conclusion.

Alyson shook her head.



" no, go..."



she urged, wiping at her tears.